What is a recipient parent/intended parent? 

Recipient parent (RP) is often used to refer to people who conceive with the aid of a donor, while intended parent (IP) is often used to refer to those intending to be the legal parent of a child born through surrogacy.  

 

You might choose to explore becoming a parent via assisted conception due to fertility issues, being in a non-heterosexual relationship, or being a solo parent by choice.  

 

How do we know if this is the best option? 

You can find support, and answers to your questions, on our external organisations page. We also recommend speaking to your GP or contacting your local integrated care board (ICB) to find out more information about the criteria for and availability of NHS funded services in your area.  

 

What does the process look like...? 

Factors such as whether you’re embarking on this process by yourself or with a partner – and if your partnership is same-sex or opposite-sex – your age, fertility status, financial situation, and where you are based in the UK will all impact the treatment options available to you.  

 

...if we’re using donated sperm?  

In the UK, you can use sperm from a clinic-sourced donor (sometimes referred to as an ‘anonymous’ donor) or one who is known to you. If you intend to use a friend or family member as a donor, they will need to go through several months of screening and counselling. You can read more about the implications of using a known donor here.  

 

Using a clinic-sourced donor means both that you won’t know the identity of the donor, and that they won’t know the identity of anyone who receives their donation. You will have access to information on basic physical characteristics, and donors may also choose to write a ‘pen portrait’ where they include some more non-identifying information. While donors who are not known to the RP(s) are often referred to as ‘anonymous’, UK law states that all children born via donations made after April 2005 have the right to learn non-identifying information about their donor once they turn 16 and identifying information once they turn 18. This is sometimes called ‘Open ID at 18’ or ‘ID release’. Laws on donor anonymity vary, and if you access treatment in a country where donor anonymity is still the law, children born from this process may never be able to find information about their donor. 

 

Currently there is a shortage of donated sperm in the UK, meaning those looking to conceive may have to source sperm from abroad, at an increased cost. One donor’s sperm can be used for up to 10 families in the UK, and this number might increase if the sperm is also used in a country outside of the UK. Children born using donor sperm can access some basic information about genetic half-siblings born via the same sperm donor once they turn 16.  

 

See our legal factsheet for more information on sperm donation laws. 

 

...if we’re using donated eggs? 

Much like with donated sperm, you can use donated eggs from a clinic-sourced donor or one who is known to you. If you intend to use a friend or family member as a donor, they will need to go through several months of screening and counselling. Additionally, if you are paying privately for fertility treatment rather than using an NHS service, you will likely have to cover the costs of processing your chosen donor.  You can read more about the implications of using a known donor here. 

 

Using a clinic-sourced (sometimes called an ‘anonymous’ donor) means both that you won’t know the identity of the egg donor, and that they won’t know the identity of anyone who receives their donation. You will have access to information on basic physical characteristics and donors may also choose to write a ‘pen portrait’ where they include some more non-identifying information. Currently there is a shortage of donated eggs worldwide, meaning those looking to conceive may find it takes longer than anticipated to be matched with a suitable donor. 

 

One donor’s eggs can be used for up to 10 families in the UK, not including the donor’s own family. Egg donors are not the legal parent of any children born from their donation (unless the egg donor also acts as a surrogate) and will not be recorded on the birth certificate. UK law states that all children have the right to learn non-identifying information about their donor once they turn 16 and identifying information (i.e. name and last known address of their donor) once they turn 18. This is sometimes called ‘Open ID at 18’ or ‘ID release’. As with sperm donation, laws on donor anonymity for egg donors vary, and if you access treatment in a country where donor anonymity is still the law, children born from this process may never be able to find information about their donor. You can learn more on our legal factsheet. 

 

...if we’re using a surrogate? 

Surrogacy is when someone agrees to undergo a pregnancy and give birth to a baby on behalf of a person or couple who are unable to do so themselves. Surrogates are legally considered the child’s mother at birth, and so intended parents must apply to the family courts for a parental order which will transfer legal parenthood from the surrogate to the IP(s). 

 

The current advice from the UK government is that anyone considering surrogacy should minimise their risk by joining one of the four main not-for-profit UK surrogacy organisations: Brilliant Beginnings, Childlessness Overcome Through Surrogacy, My Surrogacy Journey, and Surrogacy UK. It is illegal for you to advertise that you are seeking a surrogate, but these organisations can help to pair you with a suitable surrogate. These organisations may charge administrative and membership fees. 

 

The UK operates an ‘altruistic’ model of surrogacy, meaning that surrogates are reimbursed for their medical costs and any other pregnancy related expenses, but they do not receive additional financial compensation.  

 

Choosing a clinic 

Fertility clinics in the UK need a licence from the sector regulator, the HFEA, to provide fertility treatment, store eggs, sperm, and embryos, and to carry out embryo testing. In 2022/23, 107 clinics were licensed by the HFEA to provide fertility treatment. The availability of clinics varies by region. 

 

The 2022 consumer law compliance review of fertility clinics found a big variance in prices, with a single cycle of IVF costing between £5,000-£20,000 in the sample of clinics they reviewed. Some clinics may offer treatment outside of this price bracket.  It is important to ensure that the price quoted from a clinic is comprehensive, to avoid being surprised with additional charges for items like consultations or screening tests. This is especially true for clinics overseas, where the price advertised on the website often leaves out essential add-on costs. There is a high likelihood of one cycle of IVF not being successful, meaning that these prices are not reflective of the full financial cost of IVF and/or egg freezing. The review notes that many overseas countries do not independently verify success rate claims, and so it is difficult to know whether information presented on a clinic’s website is trustworthy.  

 

The CMA have produced a guide to consumer rights regarding fertility treatments, which can be accessed here. 

 

The HFEA have an online clinic finder tool where you can search for clinics in your area, and filter by treatments offered. 

 

Some UK-based intended parents decide to go abroad to find a surrogate, often due to a shortage of surrogates in the UK. Regulations and practices differ by and within countries so doing prior research is important. ‘Commercial’ surrogacy, where the surrogate is financially compensated for more than their expenses, is legal is some countries, meaning that overseas surrogacy can cost considerably more than surrogacy in the UK.

 

There are additional ethical considerations when thinking about using a clinic abroad, as laws around surrogacy can vary by country and the UK’s clinic regulator has no ability to monitor clinics abroad.

Overseas surrogacy can also lead to additional barriers around travel and citizenship for the newborn child and so it is important to seek legal advice.

 

For more information, you might want to read about the ethical implications of assisted reproduction and our factsheet on assisted conception and the law. 

 

What are the health risks? 

• According to the HFEA, the main risk with fertility treatment is the risk of multiple births.  

• Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS) is a potentially serious side effect of fertility drugs taken to increase egg production.  

• IVF, especially IVF with multiple embryos implanted, can lead to an increased risk of ectopic pregnancy as embryos can travel into the fallopian tube during the implantation process.  

• Sperm donors are screened to check for diseases prior to donating, but this screening cannot check for every potential risk. Donors are not screened for HPV (human papillomavirus), meaning HPV transmission and an increased risk of cervical cancer are potential health risks accompanying the use of donated sperm.  

 

For more detailed information please see our health implications section. Note: The information on this website is for educational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. Please consult a medical professional for more information on the health risks related to assisted conception.  

 

What should I tell my children about their origins? 

Professionals working in the field of family welfare, such as counsellors and psychologists widely recommend telling children about their origins. Donor conceived people now have a legal right to find out about their genetic origins once they turn 18, and the accessibility of direct-to-consumer genetic testing mean that this is information that all donor conceived people are likely to find out eventually. 

 

A series of studies have found that disclosing to children when they are young (before the age of 7) may lead to more positive familial relationships. 

 

A 2020 survey by We Are Donor Conceived also noted that respondents who had been told about their origins in early childhood were “significantly more likely” to report positive feelings about being born via assisted reproductive technology.  67% of respondents also felt that laws should be reformed to allow donor conceived children to know any genetic parent’s identity from birth (rather than from age 18).  

 

The Donor Conception Network have a ‘Telling and Talking’ section of their website, which includes specially created books to discuss the topic of assisted conception with children of every age.